Am working from home today as they are servicing the fire alarms and had to let them into the flat. It is a glorious, warm sunny day and ordinarily it would be lovely, but my heart sank this morning as the sun streamed in the window when I woke up.

Having trouble sleeping at the moment - keep waking really early, 5ish, and am not able to fall back to sleep as have so many thoughts whizzing around my brain. I feel excited. I really do. But I also feel really anxious, doubtful of myself, and worried about my back. It's really sore again today. I think about the possibility of not being able to finish, I wonder if I'm completely kidding myself that I can do this thing. I think about all the training sessions I've missed through injury, all the weeks where I only managed two or three out of the four scheduled runs, the 12 mile run I missed ten days ago due to my back, the fact that I had to stop about a billion times during my 8 miler last weekend because of the heat. All these things. And I think about how embarrassing and humiliating it would be to come home on Monday having failed to complete the race, how guilty and ashamed I would feel about all the people who've sponsored me. I know I need to have a major shot-in-the-arm of positive thinking between now and Sunday, because I know it'll be my attitude on the day which will be the most important factor in whether I finish or not. Up until I injured my back, the thought of not finishing never even entered my mind. I need to get back to that way of thinking again sharpish. Am going out for a 4 miler with Spock later this afternoon. I'm thinking of wearing a long-sleeved top and my wind jacket in a last, desperate attempt to acclimatise.

Did 3 miles last night along the beach. There was a lovely sea breeze and a pink sunset. My legs really ached though, while I was running, although they felt fine as soon as I stopped. My calves feel totally tight and rigid. I have a sports massage tonight with Leanne and I really hope she can loosen them up. When I had one before my 20 mile run, I really noticed the difference. Had a doctor's appointment this morning, during which she took my blood pressure and said it was 'fabulous'. It was 102 over 76 but I have absolutely no idea what that means.

Then I went to Run and bought a Pearl Izumi running hat with a visor. It was £16!!! When it comes to buying stuff for running, I seem to have no control over my spending. But I also don't want to have the sun in my eyes the whole time, and I broke my sunglasses (my thirteenth pair in two years).